Impatience bubbled out of my ears and flowed down my shoulders and I had to do something. We had been sick all weekend, Jake is out of town, we have spent days, weeks and months stuck inside, and I had to do something. So I put the girls in the bath like I typically do. Added hot water every 20 minutes and let them make a massive mess. I adjusted my attitude. And I got my camera and got my baby out of the bath, powdered, diapered her, jammies and hair combed.
I took just a few photos and forced myself to see the little things again. The things that make my eyes brim with happy tears. Tada's thin baby hair wet from the bath, combed behind her ears. That spot at Grace's dresser is always her first stop, posing her ponies just so. 20 months and she rocks imaginative play. Not necessarily with English, but still...
Full time parenting is enough to send one screaming for the hills. I roll up my sleeves to receive the 49 blows that gain me the 50th: a glimpse into bliss of the most beautiful, an endless space where our futures braid together with love.
5 comments:
That is so awesome... those small things are such sweet memories later.
Thanks for you thoughts
Xoxoxo
seriously, i have a physical reaction when i read your posts. it is a tingle in my heart/gut that just resonates as powerfully as GC talks.
you are a mommy poet, the most deepest thrilling poet i have ever read and i can not get enough! the line about the 49th leading to the 50th! YES! and it is all marked with appreciation and love and KNOWING that right now, in the moment, we are happy. we are blessed.
thanks.
and i hope you all start feeling better soon!
Okay Sarah! You put your kids in the bath and pull out the camera...I check your blog! Seriously. You have such a way of expressing what motherhood is really about and how important it is to find those little things that remind you how all that is worth it. From the bottom of my heart Thank You!
Tasha
you are not alone Sarah. <3 you
I just have to tell you--"the 49 blows to receive the 50th" paragraph is just awesome. Your writing is free of pretentiousness and cliches; it is utterly unique and keeps me coming back to your blog for more (and sometimes to just re-read old posts like this one).
You are a writer. A dang good one.
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