Tuesday, July 21, 2009

A few things.


Grace,

I try not to love you for long periods of time because then it just hurts. If I really stare at you, tall as a tree, making your own lunch, I get all misty inside. How can I not?

When you make a comment on the way I fold clothes, how good I am at it, I say something like, "that's so nice of you". But what I really want to do is grab you by the arms and squeeze, holding you perfectly still in a vice grip and say that you're what I've been waiting for my whole life. You're what I've always wanted. I want always to be near you. I could live inside of your neck in that curve just above your collarbone. It's where I feel the most at peace.

Your brain works perfectly, like a machine, like a clock, changing and flowing and noticing and caring. You don't miss one tiny thing. When we do something stupid, or don't have patience for you, you adapt. With your back straight and eyes focused ahead, you forgive us, flip your hair, mention the weather and open the fridge.

You're a grown-up already. And it's both painful and beautiful.

7 comments:

jakenapril said...

oh, isn't that just how it is. darn those firstborn eldest daughters. you took the words right out of my mouth.

p.s. i added your photo site to my blog...so everyone else can admire your talent.

Kristie said...

They grow up super fast - I really dislike that.

Jessie said...

heysarahcomeandswim

sheena said...

I am dying over her freckles!! love them!

way cute blog!! thanks so much for stopping by!

sheena said...

I am dying over her freckles!! love them!

way cute blog!! thanks so much for stopping by!

sheena said...

whoops....I got excited:)

We are: said...

Dang you, you made me cry. You should be more careful when you write like that. You might just make someone, hundreds of miles away, feel like you grabbed their heart and rung it out into words. Thank you.