Motherhood's a bit like driving across the Golden Gate Bridge in a thick fog. Where am I? What am I about to run into? It's a little scary, a little exciting at the same time. I pray that I don't get hit head on by a semi truck or flip over the guard rail into the bay.
But in the fog, somewhere, are these little faces. A weekend of crying, screaming and wailing. A weekend of tickling, laughing and nuzzling.
My eyelids are burning from lack of sleep. I texted Jake today, "are you so tired?!" We stay up late each night talking. We don't have a tv in our room which lends to deep conversation starting at around midnight, ending somewhere after 1 a.m. 95% of our conversation revolves around our girls. The unknown, the worries, the stress, the adoration.
It's nice to know Jake's the only other one on this earth that has the exact same kind of love for my children as I do. It's comforting.
We've got a pretty normal week ahead of us. Including the painstaking task of gestating #4. She's getting heavy and big and I'm only 31 weeks. Last night, after a little family birthday party for our girls I found myself laying on my bed surrounded by my two sisters and two sister-in-laws. They were there to feel my tummy. To feel the sweeping motions of a new person arriving to our family in May. They felt her kicks and stretches and were bright with excitement. This baby will be so loved.