Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Sunny weekend

I am leaving on Thursday for a weekend to remember- My younger brother Jared, our friend Katy and me are going to a concert in Indio all weekend. Katy and I are going to the Friday show, but Jared and his friends are staying for Saturday and Sunday. I'm mostly going to see my favorite band, Nickel Creek. How I wish my brother Gideon wasn't on a mission so he could go with us!! I am so excited. Music is medicine for me. When I like an artist and I go to their concert, I cry. I will have waited so long to hear them in person, and I will just stand there are blubber away while they sing. Their music moves me so much, I can't help myself. I imagine this will happen again this weekend.
I have left Gracie only one night of her entire four-year life. Our anniversary two years ago. I have never spent a night away from Ruby. I am so nervous to find out what that feels like. I know I will feel an empty feeling and just the mere distance between me and my girls is going to be rough. I know this sounds idiotic... but I just have to be with them, all the time. Don't misinterpret, I have to have my breaks, girl's nights, half a day off, but a weekend is going to be too long. I know I need it and that's why I bought my ticket so long ago. I think I need my kids way more than they need me. They'll be fine without me, hanging out with their dad and my sister, and I will be in California worrying my little heart out.
That aside, we are going to the beach all day Saturday and I plan to drink the ocean air. All day. Even when there is sand in my eyes, nose and ears and when all I can taste is salt. I'm staying til the sun goes down. All the way down. Then we'll drive back to my cousin's house in Murrietta, and drive home on Sunday.
What a sweet reunion it will be to see my lovely little babies again. It's ridiculous that I am going to have the most fun weekend ever, and all I can think about is coming home again. I am a very independent person, I promise...
Looking forward to a sunny weekend- have a great one!

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Kayla is fabulous.

This is my gorgeous neice, Kayla. Now a neice that is birthed by your own sister is something quite extraordinary. It gives us as aunts special rights and privileges otherwise not given. For instance: I devote a lot of my time to sniffing, cuddling, chewing and kissing the baby. And my sister's usual reaction is approval. If there is an instance in which my sister gets irritated (which there hasn't been yet), I could just shrug it off in circumspect because I can remember the moment just yesterday when we were in junior high and she said I couldn't borrow her shirt, and I just borrowed it anyway. See what I mean? It's the best. I can imagine it will be the same when my daughters have babies. I can have a hayday with their babies because, well, I'm their mom. YES!!
I took these photos of Kayla just last week. She can't get any prettier.

Thursday, April 19, 2007


So I bought a hair straightener. I think it's about time. I'm 27. So big news. I can take a shower in the morning, let my hair air dry, put it back in a messy-looking bun/ponytail/slobbish thing. Then I can run a million errands, run down the road chasing Ruby, roll around with Grace, play dolls. And THEN! I can straighten that day-long kink right out and I look oh so sparkly. I should have gotten one ages ago.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

And its snowing today

When it snows in April, something happens to people. Their faces turn an odd color and they try to stay warm with a long sleeved t-shirt and metallic flat shoes with no socks. Then women look down at their capris and make a silent promise they will continue wearing spring clothes during the two weeks of snowy cold. Anything to keep the winter clothes in their respective boxes until next year.
Winter here in Utah is no joke. I've never seen a better demonstration of the word "hunker down". People must be doing something inside their homes. People MUST live here. And you literally never know what's going to happen. You can't just breeze through with flip flops, when toes can really freeze off in the 2 minutes it takes for your car heater to get hot.
When we lived in Mesa, the summers were scorching. We air conditioned our house and I still couldn't sit by the wall or by a window or I would have serious sweat. The heat would somehow seep through walls, insulation, window cracks, door jams. Then there's April in Lehi. To bed, I wear cotton pjs, a hooded sweatshirt, and socks huddled under a down comforter. Ridiculous. And when it snows in late spring, people are downright ANGRY about it. A gloomy, raunchy mood envelopes the town like the angel of death. With big white chunky flakes falling from the sky.

There goes our green grass.

I think sticking to weather helps me not think about things like VA.

Monday, April 09, 2007

Happy Easter!

I know they're super grainy, but I forgot to change my ISO setting from the night before... What a mistake! Nevertheless, I can't help but post tons of photos of my girls, in all their beauty.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

I heart my brother's camera

I am borrowing my brother's camera for the weekend, and it is a HUGE difference. I want to marry the lense. Aren't my girls gorgeous?

Monday, April 02, 2007

Thoughts on Grace.

Today Gracie grinned at me and said, "Mom, I am NOT going to grow up". Not surprising, really, since I sit by her bedside at night and make her give me her promise, her WORD- that she will not grow again overnight like she did last night. It never works, but at least she tries.

The picture is of her two years ago. She was 2 years old and we were in Arcata at my Grandpa's. Her hair is curly because of the coastal air and that dimple in her elbow, I can't even begin to express how it tugs at those lines in my forehead. I love it. I love her. I didn't expect motherhood to be quite like this. Seriously, but look at that picture, who skateboards in a t-shirt that says "I love Mommy" (gotta love Old Navy), a hat that says "I love Mommy", a large belly from drinking so much milk, and flowing hair that hasn't been cut since birth? Well, the answer is she wasn't skateboarding. She was holding it waiting for one of her aunts or uncles to come and push her on it. What a rose.